Category Archives: Musings for today

“Elevation”

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The beginning:
40*6’39″N 83*45’5″W
Low elevation, 1,050 feet above sea level

It was 1975, the summer I learned to ride a bike.  It was simple, easy.  Jump on, here’s the road you have to take to get to the fun.  Sweet, summer wind-blown bicycle hair, no destination in mind. Innocence and freedom. No map needed! Navigating the world was effortless when you are five years old.

Intellectual mapping became my way to get around.  Through the eyes of others, I could view the world.  My father, my hero, had visited most of the major map coordinates on the globe, traveling for his work, before I finished college. It seemed like a glamorous life. He worked so hard for us. London, Paris, Amsterdam, Singapore, Hong Kong, Phoenix, Seattle, to name just a few. While he was gone, my mom kept us safe and close to home.

Most times, my destination was clear.  Follow these directions and you will reach your destination.  Be a good girl, do everything right, follow the rules.  Follow directions.  Don’t get lost, no matter what you do!   Ingrained in me, “don’t get lost.” Their good advice, their wisdom, played on and on, programmed to believe that if I got lost, bad things would happen.  I followed the rules.  Over time, inevitably, I got lost, frazzled and had to pull over.  I gathered my senses, my directions, picked up a map, got back up and kept moving.  Time after time, I got lost.  But it never stopped me.  Out of the hundreds of times I got lost, I made it to my destination, every time.  There were scenic routes that surprised me. There were detours, equalling dark times, that scared me. Some detours made no sense at all. Sometimes I would stumble upon a sign that spoke to me, a clue about something I needed to know, for my future self.  All those signs are now coming together. All of the detours, I am now grateful for.

There were places I visited that surprisingly would become part of my grand strategy.  There were people I met that passed by me without a second thought. There were people who have stuck by me since that summer of ’75.

Fast forward, 40 years….

There are those places that keep me coming back.  There are those people who keep me going.  My mom. My dad. They are still here. I am grateful. New faces appeared as I rode along oblivious to what was coming. Along a route named “M”, a road I thought was completed, a journey I thought was planned and done, was really just beginning on a date that seems inconsequential now. A date somewhere, written on a forgotten calendar.

During all the times I thought I was lost, those were just character building roads, strengthening moments, integrity building signs.  Those scenic routes, detours and dark places were landmarks, pinpointing pivotal points in my uneven journey to today.

The summer of 1975 was a free-spirited summer.  Now, I want to chase the endless, innocent summers to the pinnacle of my life.  At my half-way point, my latitude and longitude coordinates are adjusting.

It’s time to put down the security of the map and follow where my heart leads me.  I’m pretty sure it’s a beautiful, magical place, where I belong.

The End:
36*34’43″N 118*17’3″W
High elevation 14, 491 above sea level

Love and Light, M

(Photo of the author, summer of 1975)

“Wake Up”

wake up

 

“Wake up, wake up, you have work to do.  Wake up.”

Calling softly.  Each day, gentle reminders of a calling I had forgotten.  Each day, sometimes more than once, signs from beyond this place.  Hearts in the sky, in the trees and leaves, meaningful signs of a being greater than me. Wrapped in a shaw of stars, the sun and moon. I rose slowly, taking years to open my eyes.  Hollow spaces in my heart began to fill.  With loving energy flooding into and out of me, I woke up.  Reminding me of my inner light, my healing words and hands. Awakened to a new day. Awakened to my calling.

“Wake up, my love, wake up.  Your work is not done.”

Rise, awaken, be love. Take my shaw covered in stars, the sun and moon. Wrap yourself in it’s loving warmth.

I turn to you.  I ask, “wake up, my love.  You have work to do.  Wake up.”

Love and Light, M

“Cardinal-Red”

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Brave morning, launch into a fresh day
Survival kicks in, be attentive to it
Savor the crisp air, revel in the cardinal-red leaves

Pay attention, leaves are changing once again
We never notice, until it is too late

Recovery becomes second nature
On the edges, red hues dangle
Holding on for dear life, like us

Suddenly, red falls to an eternal home
She welcomes her children, once again

Awareness belongs to us as we witness another fall
Check into the cardinal-red edges of the leaves
Notice as they dance and change

Collectively, we all change, you…. me

Overnight, it seems, cardinal-red leaves cover the earth again
Overnight, it seems, we change

Not a transition of green to orange to red, gradually
A flourishing transition from silence to strength to resilience

Breaking away, changing to the cardinal-red, dropping to the earth
Taking courage to let go
Yet holding onto faith, allowing change
A deeper understanding
Entering another fall season, grateful

Let’s mirror the trees. Let’s be graceful with our passage into fall.

I wonder, do the trees notice their leaves changing? One day, morning comes and their leaves manifest into a marvelous cardinal-red. We step outside and admire their glory. They allow their constant spring companions to let go, falling to their mother. They don’t try to hold on. They let go gracefully. Ritually, they let go, and one day, the cardinal-red leaves are gone. Solid, forgiving trees, they stand alone. They understand, they accept, they adapt. Their abscission complete. Ready for the bitter winter, their warmth radiates from the inside.

They embrace their inner light.

I wonder, do we let go gracefully? Do we resist the evolution into another season, another year coming to a close?

We change every minute, every day, without even recognizing it. Then one day, we are ready to let the cardinal-red leaves attached to us go. Small changes within ourselves allow us to understand, accept, adapt. Let’s not mourn the loss, but embrace it. Our season with the cardinal-red leaves taught us valuable lessons. Embracing our inner light will keep us warm.

“Haberdashery at Heaven’s Gate”

 

Mono Angel

 

Are we angelic seamstresses crafting magical, meaningful words on intricate fabrics woven around our lives?

When we remember our times of struggles and challenges, what word personifies you? What word personifies me? Are you a hopeful word? Are you a positive line? Are you a word to remember, a word that warms other’s hearts?

My hope, in the end, is that you embody one word: angel

My hope, for you, is that you meet angels in the flesh, through the eyes of each person you encounter, through each person you touch.

Be an angelic being who heals, helps and listens. Who has the ability to mend hearts. Be an angelic being who wants only goodness.

Lift others up to their highest good, angel.

Take your needles and thread, repair the broken-hearted, angel.

“Haberdashery at Heaven’s Gate”

Haberdashery at heavens gate
A noble store with all that mends
Buttons, ribbon and thread
Angel seamstresses repairing the broken

Up and again, broken souls appear
Waiting in line
“When the time is right, we will repair your heart”

Button up, despair displayed upon your dress
Orange ribbons wrap the skirt of unrequited love
Red threads connect a notion of a heart

Remove inflamed needles from tattered skin
Use them to stitch
Mend…. come to the gates and mend
Apprentices of a divine being
Ready for your brokenness

The broken find the broken
Across time and circumstance
Angelic healers in human form
Another one waits around the corner

Upon the cutting table, angels work in succession
Quickly stitching a notion of a heart
“Hurry, hurry, it’s spilling over the edge”
Nimble, fragile fingers, mend

Haberdashery at heavens gate
Lost ones meander up to the shop owner
He smiles and asks them to enter
He tells them it’s time to heal

“Scattered Light”

 

Tarpy 9.23.15 scattered lightScattered light
A sanctuary
A cathedral of trees, leading to the One

Faithful, loving, forgiving
Visceral love under the protection of His leaves

If they fall, He will still be there, waiting for me

When they fall, his cold limbs outstretch to protect me from the outsiders

A golden trail leading to Him
The essence of heaven circles around His roots
Eternal light, scattered until now, waiting for a place to call home

Upon entering, amnesia rules the mind
Thick meandering thoughts, toxic words and actions
They leave, once here, they are gone
Only pure, cosmic energy enters the subconscious mind

He is a beacon of light, amongst the others
He believes in me
No words exchanged, only pure loving energy transferred to me

A sanctuary with Him
A cathedral of trees, leading me to the One
Scattered light has found her home

“Red Rock”

Red Rock

An ode to the ones who rise above:

That day
When everything falls into place
Under the desert sun
At the top of the hard-earned peak

Is it just another day?
A sunrise came and went
Bright blue sky overhead
Red rocks to the north

No, it’s not just any day
That clarity becomes apparent
As the sun rests it’s head on the mountains
Descending into the starry night

That day, a healing energy arrives
It comes to many, but they can’t feel it
They let it vanish with the passage of time
It disappears as quickly as it came

Our clarity reaches new heights when man and sky have no limits between them

Who will take my place?
Will they allow you to heal?
Does clarity breach the distance between sky and man?
Will you feel open to the sky? Will you be open to mankind?

Our Sanctuary is the sky
Our Buddha is the mountains
Our God is the earth beneath our feet
Our Souls touching no matter the distance

“564 Walks”

Tarpy 8.15

 

564 times, I’ve walked these woods
Not a sound but my own heart
My feet, walking the path ahead

My intentions, simple….

To open my eyes, to see the truth
Be thoughtful, to think clearly
Be loving, and to love despite it all

It only took 564 walks in the woods
To be open, to be thoughtful, to be love
I wonder what another 564 walks will bring me?

“Kite=Love”

“If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it’s yours. If it doesn’t, it never was.”

Love isn’t ownership, or obligation. It shouldn’t have to be set free to know if it is real or to know if it existed. A kite only knows that it is allowed and free to fly, regardless of the strings attached to it.   Shouldn’t love fly the same as a kite?

Kites float across the horizon, on the longest day on earth
So long… it seemed so long

A string, held by the hands of a beloved child
It dips and sways
Forever trying to kiss the purple-ribboned sky above

Our hearts are whimsical kites, floating yet attached to another
Wanting to be free yet safe, loved unconditionally
Gently caressing the sticky wind
Searching for the expanding horizon to let us go

Held down by lead strings
By our beloved ones who want to keep us close
We yank and pull, despite knowing it is time
Still tethered to the hands that say they love us

Our hearts are able to fly
If we let them go and see where the wind can take us
Only when let go
Is our heart truly free

A lone kite waves across the shoreline
Our beloved children run down the beach
Holding on for comfort and security
“Let go, be free, come back when you are ready”

We watch the kite emblazoned with tortured hearts
Drift down the beach, set free by our beloved
As waves storm the shore, we watch
As we let go of the string that holds it down, we say good-bye

Golden Sky, Greet Our Eyes

Golden sky, greet our eyes
Sincere guests arrive
Sweet sounds remind us of days gone by
Seasons taken for granted

We all do it…. Assume…. Rely…. Impose….Hide….Ignore

Why can’t we….. Just trust?

Where were you?  Where was I?
A film reel plays behind the scenes
Moments gone instantly

If only…. If only…. The two saddest pairing of words ever spoken

Life, sit awhile as Dawn knocks at the door
Life, hold our hands for a minute, as Sun stops by to remind us of His warmth

Golden sky, greet my eyes
Singing leaves begin to send their summer notes through the morning air
Falling gently to the baked September earth

Memories we want to touch

One more time
Just one more time, we wonder
Would those memories play out the same?  Or did we create an imaginary view of the past?  More magical, extraordinary, more meaningful than we truly experienced?

Life, sit with us, savor the living, thoughts gone as quickly as they came
Life, your precious face escapes us
All we want is to touch your liveliness, your laughter, one more time
Life, we miss you, remember us as the passage fills the golden dawn

Life looks up to the wonder at the line on the golden horizon and says….

“Only love today”

Memories of love equal worth and immortality. Choose love today. Love wins, always.

“My Anam Cara”

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“If I could be strong like you were for me, you are my faith”
Cure My Tragedy- Cold

Two beautiful souls
Carrying their burdens
To the banks of the chocolate river
Assumed, implicit innocence

Heartfelt thanks in the making

Turtles along the shore
Congregate under their shells
Ducks glide by

Angel guides watching

“They made it,” said one turtle to her friend
“Their journey has begun,” said a duck to his mother
Indian spirits gather around
Breathing life into their crippled bodies

Along the days
She carried him
He carried her

Unspoken words filled the morning air

One by one
Her burdens lifted
She placed them in the river
Together, they watched them float away

A calm and healing place
Mere children in their thoughts

A golden warrior
A fallen angel, holding clover in her Celtic fingers

Meeting under Leatherlips
A battlefield forevermore
Sacred, precious ground
Long held meeting place of the Anam Cara’s before them

A constant reminder, a soul friend, my Anam Cara
Love finds you
Heals you, leads you to your fate
Brings peace to heavy, clover-covered hearts